The Power of Proximity

Jul 25, 2022 | Monday Mindset

This is the Monday Mindset Newsletter that was sent out on Monday 7/25/2022

Good morning and happy Monday from Austin, Texas!

I hope you all had a great weekend and are ready to attack the week ahead. 

Last Friday, my family and I flew down from Boise, ID to Austin, TX for our sixth Squire Program event. For any of you who may be unaware, the Squire Program is a 16-hour, father/son bonding and rite of passage event. 

Fathers and their teen boys between the ages of 13-16 came from all over the country to join this event held at Tim Kennedy’s Sheepdog Response HQ. 

The event was amazing and the feedback already from the fathers and sons has been incredible. 

And the recurring topic within the feedback is the focus of today’s Mindset… the POWER of PROXIMITY

The weekend kicked off with an amazing Instructor dinner at one of Austin’s finest steak restaurants. We spent a couple of hours breaking bread and catching up on what everyone has been up to.

Tim Kennedy had just gotten home after being deployed for 5 months all around the world doing some really amazing things, so that was a fascinating conversation to have. I wish I could share some of the stories! 

Wes Whitlock, another guest Instructor for this course, is the founder and CEO of Rogue American Apparel, a highly successful brand, and product line. Hearing from him about how he has created a multi-million dollar company and his future goals with the new coffee company he recently launched, was amazing. 

As I looked around the room and took inventory as to who was sitting at the table and what they were accomplishing in both their personal and professional lives, I was humbled to have a seat at the table. 

On Saturday, once the event kicked off, we had 30 dads and sons show up at 0530 in the morning. We spent the day challenging each of them mentally and physically. At times they would work as a father/son team.. other times would be dads vs sons.. and other times it would be individual introspective work.

One of the lessons I shared with the fathers was about my experiences back in 2013-2016 when I was a young entrepreneur, drowning in debt and circling the toilet bowl personally and professionally. Back then, I was in way too close proximity to people with low standards and who were willing to accept mediocrity. I was in way too close of proximity to unhealthy eating and poor nutritional discipline. I was just way too close in proximity to all kinds of shit that wasn’t helping me achieve my goals. And my circumstances around my Health, Wealth, and Relationships made it very clear! 

But then I hired my first mentors and coaches. It was around 2017 that I began to create distance and have much less proximity to the people and circumstances that were negatively impacting my success. It was when I learned that Leadership was ALWAYS the problem and ALWAYS the solution. It was also when I became very intentional about committing to having non-negotiable Core Values and higher standards of expectations for myself and others around me. 

And once my proximities changed, holy smokes….. so did my outcomes. 

So here is my plea for all of you… Evaluate the relationships you have with the people, behaviors, and habits that are getting in the way of achieving your goals. 

Dramatically edit and if needed, delete those relationships entirely. Create as much distance and have as little proximity to those people, habits, and relationships as possible. 

And instead…. 

Get closer and have as close of proximity to the people, habits, and relationships that will assist you in achieving your goals as quickly as possible. 

But know this… Others with high standards of expectations WILL NOT allow you to get in close proximity to them, even if you want to, if you don’t have your shit figured out first. You MUST be an effective leader of yourself and you MUST learn to be an asset and never a liability to those people you want to be in close proximity with. 

Make no mistake about it, high achievers do not just allow anyone to have a seat at their table. If I was the same person making the same decisions I was back in 2016, there is absolutely ZERO chance I would have a seat at the table with Tim Kennedy, Wes Whitlock, Bedros Keuilian, and all the others. 

So make sure you do the work on yourself first.

And if you’re a parent, help your kids understand these massively important lessons as well. Let them see that you understand them by the decisions you make and the outcomes you produce. Help your kids pick good friends and shield them from the people or habits that will lead them down the wrong path. 

Proximity is massively powerful my friends. Use it to your advantage.

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