This is the Monday Mindset Newsletter that was sent on Monday 11/28/2022…
Good morning, Team!
For today’s Mindset Message, I want to share with you some of the most significant success lessons that have helped me become wealthy in the areas of my Family, our Finances, and my Fitness.
To start, let me give you some background for those of you who don’t know…
Back in 2015 timeframe, I was at an all-time low in the areas of my family, our finances, and my fitness…
I was a young entrepreneur back then and lacked many of the leadership skills and business acumen to thrive. After a couple of years of grinding and grinding some more and grinding even further, my relationship with my wife was extremely strained. We argued all of the time and didn’t enjoy each other’s company at all. The stress of the business had taken its toll, and we became two ships passing at night, closer to divorce than we were to any kind of happiness.
I was an absentee father to my son, and even though the office to our business was only a few miles from the house, I spent virtually all of my time trying to save a business that barely had its nose above water. I missed countless events with my son. I was rarely home to read him a book. And when I was home, I was rarely in the mood or had the energy to be playful with him.
I wasn’t working out regularly, but I was hitting the drive-thrus at most of the local fast-food joints. As a result, my weight climbed to a staggering 250 lbs (see the photo below)! I was a fat slob who hated how he looked in the mirror, and even still, I did very little to change my behaviors.
To say that my faith in myself as a husband, father, and entrepreneur was in the dumps is an understatement.
At that time, I didn’t really know what to do anymore. But I did know that if I didn’t change my behaviors, I was going to end up a fat.. broke.. bachelor.. with limited custody of my son.
I decided to put my pride and ego aside and ask for help. I couldn’t fake having my shit together anymore. And if I had known what to do myself, I would have done it already.
I connected with a successful entrepreneur I knew and spilled the beans. I asked him for help, and even though I didn’t have the money to hire him as a coach, I did it anyway. It was clear that the cost of a divorce, losing the business, and child support was going to be FAR greater than the cost of a coach, so I went all in on being coached and mentored.
Right away, I was made aware of a few things… 1) Leadership was always the problem and is always the solution. I WAS THE PROBLEM. 2) I was so close to the problems that I wasn’t able to see the forest through the trees or any of my blind spots that were tripping me up and landing me in pitfalls. 3) I was learning massively difficult and costly lessons because I was going at it alone instead of following the clues of success.
As I was coached up, I trusted the process and began shifting my behaviors while at the same time implementing entrepreneurial success habits that I had never known about or heard before.
So many of the things were Common Sense, just not Common Knowledge!
As time went on and I continued stacking more wins than losses on a weekly and monthly basis, my faith in myself gradually went up. The arguing with my wife began to dissipate. The pounds of fat began to disappear, and my time with my son became more frequent and quality.
And while it took me some time to crawl out of the pits of despair that I was in with the help of coaching and mentorship, I eventually made my way from the lowest of valleys to the highest of peaks!
Today (and for years now), my relationship with my wife and son is amazing. We love spending time with each other, and there is VERY LITTLE that we don’t do together… We train and compete in Jiu-Jitsu together.. My wife and I work out 5 days a week together.. we run errands together.. we travel together… we own multiple companies together.. We ENJOY EACH OTHER’S COMPANY!! In fact, just this weekend, we bought 3 top of the line Super73 E-Bikes to start going on some new adventures on!
I’m 8 years older and in the best shape of my life (check out the before and after pictures below).
Our finances are amazingly healthy. We have virtually zero debt, send my mom thousands a month to help her retire, have over 6 figures just sitting in a rainy day fund in one of our accounts, and are preparing to take a multi-million dollar exit from one of the companies we have ownership in.
Here is how I went from some of the deepest valleys to the highest peaks and how you can do the same!
1) If you have progress you’d like to make or need to make in the areas of your Family, Fitness, and/or Finances, you may not have the knowledge, experience, or expertise to address it alone. Be humble enough to recognize it.
2) Put your ego and pride aside and ask for help from someone who was once where you are and is now where you want to be. Have an open and transparent conversation with them and if you two would be a good fit for each other, invest in yourself and your family by hiring that person as your coach and mentor.
3) Trust the process of your coaching and mentorship. If you already knew what to do, you would have already done it by now. Keep your ego and pride in check!
4) Be aggressive with making the necessary changes but patient with the results they will produce. It takes discipline and consistency over time to produce significant results. You didn’t get to the valleys overnight, and you won’t find yourself on the peaks overnight either.
5) FAITH REMOVES LIMITATIONS. The longer you stack more wins than losses, the more faith you will gain in yourself. That increased faith creates more and more momentum. And that momentum will stack more wins faster. That’s when things get really fun!!
I hope my past and current experiences help you in some way. The only way my past experiences become more tragic is if I didn’t use them to help others.
Here are those pictures… The outward lack of health resembles the lack of health in all the other important areas of my life at that time. The opposite is true in my current picture. The one from 2015 is still hard to look at but keeps me motivated AF to NEVER go back to that old version of myself.
Go forth and conquer, team,
Matt